Monday, June 24, 2013

Who the hell am I?

It's been 7 months since I left the restaurant business.

I've never been more depressed with my life than I am right now. Once again things are not working out at all liked I planned.

I used to be someone else. Someone I admired. Someone I thought would amount to something in life. But I don't know who I am anymore. I hate the person I've become.

I'm so depressed. It's slowly killing me. I can't remember the last time a day when be when I didn't think I'd be better off dead.

Today I thought I was having a heart attack. Or maybe I was hoping it was a heart attack. I don't know.

This shit sucks.


  1. Then do something about it. Get some help or check yourself into a health facility. If you know you are depressed then you are able to face getting help... no denial. Life can get better but only you can make it better.

  2. I hate 2 c that you're having a bad time. All I've got 2 offer you are my good thoughts of which I got a lot 4 ya. And like I always remind myself when I'm working a double close, "I've never worked a shift that didn't eventually end," and I'm expecting that'll be true of your bad times. Coffeypot there has some words of wisdom 4 ya.
    Hang in there bro.

    BEST WISHES_______-Joe

  3. Damn.

    I agree with Coffeypot, maybe you should see someone.

  4. Sorry, no advice here. Just try to change.

  5. Maybe this is unsolicited advice, especially in a comments section, but, have you ever considered talking to a therapist? I only ask, because I am prone to depression (during the last bout, I woke up every single morning and thinking about swallowing antifreeze...for months). I sometimes helps to discuss whatever is happening with a professional who can help you recognize the cycles of your mind, and work out cognitive techniques to bring mental clarity.

  6. Hey. I have been MIA due to a move, but was distressed to come back and find you so sad.

    I have to agree with Coffeypot [and I never agree with him. hee] I hope you got the help you need. You deserve better my friend.

    Take care. Email if you need or read this, okay?

  7. Feelin better?? Its August 2013 are things in good shape now?

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  9. It's June 2014, I miss your blogs. I hope all is okay with you. Write back soon!


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